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ielts 范文

雅思8分作文 | 城市迅速发展对年轻人的影响

As major cities around the world are growing fast and many problems occur. What are the problems that young people live in cities are caused by continued growth? What solutions do you suggest?

随着世界各地的主要城市都发展迅速,许多问题发生。这种持续的发展给居住在城市的年轻人带来了怎样的问题?你建议什么解决方案?

题目来源:2017年11月25日大陆考场。此题为雅思写作基础考点类型 ,观点综合性较强,建议各位烤鸭多多关注~

由OGE雅思外籍成员Tessa提供写作思路与范文

高分范文

Major cities worldwide are experiencing rapid growth which can cause many problems.(改写题目) This essay will discuss the problems specific to young people living in cities undergoing exponential growth, and suggest some solutions. (文章论述内容简介)

While a growing city creates a booming job market, young people are adversely affected by their lack of experience in the employment sector and the perception that youth equates to immaturity and incompetence. (影响1)Furthermore, for many youth the ability to successfully gain employment is hindered by the sheer number of applicants seeking work. (进一步解释)Moreover, a rapidly growing city also tends to incur a higher cost of living. Even for those able to successfully find work, their income is likely to be much lower than those with work experience. Their salaries may be insufficient in meeting the costs of living, and this kind of borderline poverty can exacerbate other symptoms of overpopulation, such as depression and stress.(影响2)

To alleviate such problems, governments can work with employers to enable them to hire younger staff. This can be done through incentives such as subsidies for these employers, and apprenticeships, where young people can learn and earn while on the job. Not only does this mean young people gain experience, making them more employable in the future, their employers also benefit from the fresh perspectives and natural affinity for tech that younger people bring. In turn, this creates further job opportunities for young people, where they are able to work in higher-paying jobs, thus alleviating financial burdens.

It is important that governments recognise the problems young people face in growing cities, and equally, the value young people can bring to their cities. By creating opportunities and meaningful employment for young people, they, their employers, and society at large all benefit.

高分句型

1. While a growing city creates a booming job market, young people are adversely affected by their lack of experience in the employment sector and the perception that youth equates to immaturity and incompetence.

While放句首,表“尽管”,为让步状语从句

2. Not only does this mean young people gain experience, making them more employable in the future, their employers also benefit from the fresh perspectives and natural affinity for tech that younger people bring.

1)Not only+助动词+sb. Do sth. 半倒装

2)making them more employable in the future 动名词短语做主句的伴随状语

3. It is important that governments recognise the problems young people face in growing cities

It is important that+从句

主语从句,it为形式主语,无实际意义

思路解析

Paragraph 1

由于题目的内容比较简单直接,首段内容也需尽量简略,只转述题目的背景内容并说明本文目的即可

Paragraph 2

回答第一个问题,城市发展给年轻人带来的影响,主要从年轻人的就业问题和生活成本问题两个方面展开论述

Paragraph 3

回答第二个问题,如何解决以上的负面影响。对于社会问题的解决方案,主题动作发出对象一般为government,因而这段主要论述government需采取的行动

Paragraph 4

再次总结强调以government 为主导的解决措施

关键词

  • specific to 针对于
  • exponential growth 指数式增长
  • equate to 等同于
  • immaturity n. 未成熟,不完美 词根:mature
  • incompetence n. 无资格,不胜任 反义词:competence n. 能力,胜任 词根:compete
  • hinder v. 阻碍,打扰
  • incur v. 招致,带来
  • borderline poverty 临界贫困
  • exacerbate v. 使加剧,使恶化 同义词:aggravate
  • symptom n. 症状
  • alleviate v. 减轻,缓和
  • incentive n. 动机
  • subsidies n. 补助,津贴
  • apprenticeship n. 学徒
  • natural affinity 自然亲和力

【作者介绍】Tessa,OGE雅思外籍成员,母语为英语,新西兰坎特伯雷大学英语文学和法语专业。(以上中文由OGE雅思助教团队提供)

点评

该作文为8分范文

题目本身难度相对较低,找出合理的论点也相对比较简单,但在范文中笔者并没有一次性提出多个不同的论点,而是非常细致地讨论了两个方面的影响,而解决方案上也只是从government一个方面入手去分析。因而,高分的关键,不是直接性给出更多的论点,而是让每一个论点更有说服力。

点评教师:周文丽Vivien:OGE雅思写作主讲。英国斯特拉斯克莱德大学学士学位,谢菲尔德大学硕士学位,对雅思考试的命题思路研究深刻透彻。

~End~

Good luck with your IELTS test

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